Writing for Television
I can safely say now that person is an asshole. I don’t understand the mockery theater majors endure, as if we said, “I’m getting a degree in juggling.“戏剧艺术家拥有许多技能，有些人甚至会玩杂耍. Or at least mime it. Maybe I’m lucky. Not only can I juggle, 但我在伯洛伊特大学接受了非常棒的戏剧教育，没有其他经历对我为电视写作的工作有这么大的帮助.
尽管我在伯洛伊特的教育受到了很多人的影响, 我想特别指出两个人:Rod Umlas和Bob Acevedo. 大一时，校园里到处散发着“即兴喜剧试镜”的传单.把它们绑起来的二年级学生是个剃了光头的矮个子，动作像猴子一样, do an impeccable Hitler impression, and make anyone laugh. This was Bob Acevedo. 在接下来的一个星期里，鲍勃召集了一群形形色色的怪人加入他的即兴剧团. 我们立即开始集体讲故事，发挥我们的想象力，磨练我们的智慧. At first, we took the name Freudian Slips. 然后，互联网上的研究显示，有上千个其他的剧团都有这个名字, so Andy Cameron’02 came up with the name Voodoo Barbie, 显然是在他童年最爱的两样东西之后.
For the next four years, Voodoo Barbie met on Tuesdays and Thursdays in Weeks Lounge, creating characters and situations, telling stories and cracking each other up. We started performing in front of audiences and over time, we could fill Richardson Auditorium on a Friday night. 03届的丹·巴洛会穿上奶牛装邀请餐厅里的每个人来看我们的表演. Back then, there wasn’t a whole lot to do on campus, so if you were drunk, stoned, or bored, our shows were wildly entertaining. Bob Acevedo was proud of his strange and wacky circus. 在他大四的最后一场演出之后，我们把他扛在肩上，就像鲁迪一样.
当我不做即兴表演的时候，我在表演我们戏剧迷们称之为“罗德的作品”的东西.罗德·乌姆拉斯教授每学期教几门戏剧课，并导演一部戏剧. To this day, 我很感激罗德把我介绍给一些我最喜欢的剧作家:娜奥米·华莱士, Sam Shepherd, August Wilson. 罗德阅读了世界上所有的剧本，并把它们都放在办公室里一堆像漫画一样大的文件里. 多年来，我上了他开设的每一门课，但其中最引人注目的是“脚本分析”. 他的学生们围着尼斯舞台下面的一张大桌子，读着《十大菠菜台子》或《菠菜白菜吧》中的场景, Rod would ask, “which character is driving this scene, what does she want, how is she going about getting what she wants, what is the moment she has won or lost her goal?” Through this meticulous analysis of scenes, we learned two things: the essence of drama, and 15 people in a windowless room gets stinky.
13年后，我成为了《真人国际菠菜》的编剧. 每天，我都坐在影视城的一个房间里，就像尼斯舞台下面的教室一样. 这部剧的编剧就像巫毒芭比娃娃一样，是一群古怪的人. We’re forced to think on our feet and call out lines. 我们把故事、想法和妙语编成剧本. When a draft is finished, it’s time for Script Analysis. Under the guidance of our showrunner, we pore over each scene, tracking the main character’s goal, making sure that character is active, keeping the drama alive. 接下来，我们把剧本交给一个非常有才华的演员，他们将在接下来的五天里排练. 编剧们观看每一次排练，跟踪故事的进展，倾听哪些笑话管用. 然后我们邀请现场观众观看节目的录制过程. It’s like putting up a one-act play. 有时，一句台词或一个笑话不连贯，编剧们必须当场想出一个新的. In these moments, before a live audience, 我的工作感觉就像是我在伯洛伊特从鲍勃和罗德那里学到的两种戏剧流派的综合——理解戏剧的工具, while approaching it with a playful and improvisational mind. Damn it. I majored in juggling after all.
在加入《菠菜白菜吧》的编剧团队之前，乔恩·哈勒曾为《菠菜白菜吧》撰稿. He lives in Glendale, Calif.
Connections
Theatre Nerds
“When I came back to Beloit for my 10-year reunion, 戏剧迷们正在和我们最喜欢的教授共进晚餐, Rod Umlas, at a Mexican restaurant in Janesville. 罗德带来了一本相册，里面有他从我们参演的一些戏里拍的照片. 在《十大菠菜台子》里有一张我的照片，那是我大四的最后一场演出. 我扮演了一个在最后一幕把自己的脑袋炸飞的花心瘾君子(罗德总是挑有趣的戏)。. I had to perform that last scene in my boxers and one night, when I shot myself and fell back into the bed, my boxers flipped up, exposing me to some elderly ladies sitting in the front row.
“Ten years later, at that Mexican restaurant, Rod told me that play was sponsored by John Pasquin’67, a Beloit alumnus who went to grad school at Carnegie Mellon. 我和约翰一起制作《真人国际菠菜》已经有两年了，但我不知道A，我们都去了伯洛伊特, 第二，他基本上赞助了我最丢脸的戏剧经历. 当我回到洛杉矶时，我发现帕斯昆正在舞台上导演那一集. 我递给他一张同学聚会上的贝洛伊特贴纸，说:“谢谢你。, some old ladies saw my junk.’”
Last Man Standing
“Back in 2011 when we were taping the pilot episode, I knew working on this show would be a wild ride. John Pasquin, 他曾和蒂姆·艾伦一起执导过《真人国际菠菜》和《真人国际菠菜》, was the obvious choice to direct the pilot. 他是一位独特的电视导演，他在电影方面的经验给《真人国际菠菜》的舞台带来了深度感.
“飞行员很难，因为很多厨师都在厨房里打闹. The show’s creator, Jack Burditt, gracefully waded through a storm of notes from the studio, network, cast, 和帕斯昆本人一起，在演出之夜把剧本写得尽可能尖锐. There were a lot of late-night rewrites, but by the end of the final week of rehearsals, 我们邀请了200人坐在观众席上观看直播.
当帕斯昆喊“开始”时，蒂姆·艾伦在雷鸣般的掌声中出场. 蒂姆在舞台上的魅力和娴熟的喜剧技巧是我从未见过的. 他的一个眼神或一声叹息就能使观众哄堂大笑. 听到观众对他的拥抱，我知道这个节目很特别. In January of 2016, we taped our 100th episode.”
